This is my seventh attempt at an introductory paragraph for this review. The problem I’m having is I cannot seriously discuss any element of this game. In this moment, I am failing as a reviewer on all fronts. I really want to be objective. I don’t want to blast every element of the game, because I can see just the slightest sliver of potential. But the simple fact remains that this game is just so terrible, so awful, such a failure on almost every level imaginable, that it’s actually draining my ability to discuss it rationally.