Hallowe’en this year marked a minor milestone in my house. After Charlotte got her sackfull of candy, we returned home and watched The Nightmare Before Christmas. We watched the whole thing, and as far as I can remember this is the first time she’s sat with me and watched an entire full length feature film, animated or otherwise.
This is a Fat Dad With Glasses review, which means I’ll be mostly covering it from the father-of-a-five-year-old-girl angle. If you want my grown-up independent type view point… Here you go:
Despite being a fresh take, it still features a pretty derivative theme. However, the movie is very entertaining. It’s a masterwork of visual and musical achievement.
If you would like that opinion expanded upon… Seriously? You can go pretty much anywhere else on the internet. Or bait me with a comment below. It’s shockingly easy to get me to talk about something “I’m not gonna talk about” with comments.
Yesterday may have been Video Game Day–as confirmed by nothing less of a source than daysoftheyear.com--but today… today is the 30th Anniversary of one of the industry’s most ground breaking accomplishments. Super Mario Bros. turns 30 goddamn years old today.
There is seriously nothing that I can add to the conversation about this game.
I could marvel at its design–so innovative that its high water mark has only ever really been topped by other games in the same franchise. I could talk about it cementing Mario as a pop culture icon. I could share personal anecdotes about trying to reach The Negative World, or playing the game while looking at the TV in a mirror, or wrestling the controller away from a superior Player 1 shouting “Hurry up and die, so I can play!”. Something Something Iconic Soundtrack, etc., etc.
But everything… everything–good and bad–has been said better by someone else. Go read and/or watch their stuff. It’s good, really.
Instead, I’m going to be a lame dad, and share the names my daughter, Charlotte, gave the Goombas (and Koopa Troopa) found on World 1-1. That’s right, I’m turning a review of an unparalleled gaming classic into a shitty Facebook post.
If I’m not on record with this statement elsewhere on this blog… I’m going on record with it now. The Super Nintendo Entertainment System is the greatest console ever made. Every game on it that I loved, I’ve gone back to play again over 10 years later, and they still hold up. This can’t be said for many of the great games of older consoles. It can’t be said of (many) newer consoles, either, because enough time hasn’t past yet.
“But… that’s just nostalgia talking,” I can hear you saying.
“Is not!” was once my go-to response to such naysaying. But no longer! I now have evidence. It’s Charlotte’s favourite system.
I’ve often wondered how I should handle the “bathroom stuff” when I’m flying solo with Charlotte out in the real world. When she needs to go, obviously I need to drag her into the men’s room with me. Do I let her solo the stall right out of the gate? Obviously I should close the door, right? Could she fall in? When do I let her handle the ladies’ room on her own? What if she wants me to go in with her, but insists on using the ladies’ room? All of these questions have been floating around in my head from the moment I realized that there was at least a 50% chance that I could be fathering a girl. They popped up more and more in recent months, as potty training became more and more of a focus.
One question I hadn’t ever considered, though, was what I should do if I needed to go. That’s what happened about 5 minutes into our retail excursions one evening a few months ago.
Apparently these two Japanese exclusive figures are entering a re-release phase that will have them end up at North American distribution houses.
If you’re wondering, these are two iconic Nintendo characters. That’s Link, from The Legend of Zelda series on the left, and Samus from the Metroid series on the right.
Stuff like this is precisely the reason I try to never follow toy-related news. I end up seeing pictures of amazing things that I do not–and probably never will–have. I should try to get a hold of a couple of those Samuseses. (Sami? What’s the plural of Samus?) One would look fantastic in a box on the shelf, and Charlotte deserves to have a Samus, even if she’d certainly destroy it in minutes.
Hello again, everyone. So far this year my movie watching has been pretty limited. I’ve managed to catch a few grown-up titles. Mostly, though, if I get to watch a movie, it’s a computer animated one that ends up not actually capturing my daughter’s attention in the least. Here’s a grab bag of titles that I ended up finishing on my own, while Charlotte ran around looking for her pig hat, or blocks, or whatever.
So, Charlotte is over 2 and a half years old now. I’m sure you’ve heard about the terrible twos. Kids do some of their craziest shit in their terrible twos. They sing, they dance, they have no shame, they have no volume control what-so-ever, and they are more adept at recording and repeating your conversations in inappropriate situations than Macaulay Culkin with a fucking Talk-Boy. Everyone that’s ever watched a family film, sit-com, or stand up comedian knows this.
But here at FGWG, I like to try and have your back. I like to pass on information no one seems to want you to know. Things like, breastfed infants projectile shitting distances of at least 6 feet with their diaper off. No one warns you about that. I thought the total surprises like that were the real danger. I was wrong. The real danger is the kind of stuff that you think might be over-exaggerated by others. Surely certain kinds of behaviour can’t go on for years, with no end in sight. Well, they can, and they probably will.