So, the little bit of TV that I have watched these last few weeks has been full of commercials as always. But one particular brand of commercial has been standing out quite a bit lately. Yogurt. Fucking yogurt commercials are on every goddamn show on every goddamn channel, every goddamn day.
Yogurt commercials, like most commercials for consumables these days, are particularly bad offenders for creating scientific sounding, market-friendly words… or “Making Shit Up”, as they call it in the real world. I don’t know what the flying fuck a B.L. Regularis is supposed to be, but I can damn well fuckin’ assure you it is either:
- A) No where’s near as fancy and scientific as they’d have you believe.
- 2) Real, but completely fucking devoid of any kind of value on a digestive level
- iii) Completely and utterly made the fuck up bullshit.
Same thing goes with Omega anything, Pre and Pro-biotic blah blah blah, and whatever the fuck Saturn’s yellow rings are supposed to represent. Which of course, is a whole other ball game. Why, WHY, is all the “good stuff” in yogurt commercials yellow? They’re hinting at it making you crap more, right? If my crap was to come out in yellow balls… well… Let’s just say there’s a short list of things that would make me go to the doctor, and you can be damn well sure that shitting out yellow balls patterned into an arrow shaped form is on that fucking list.
Now I’m so worked up, I’m too fucking lazy to YouTube these piece of shit commercials so I can growl about them more. I fucking hate commercials.